Fic: Salvation is a Four Letter Word

Title: Salvation is a Four Letter Word 12/14
Author: isolde13
Rating: R
Pairing: Kris/Adam
Summary: That very last thing on Kris' mind that day was purchasing a new slave. And then he set eyes on Adam. And everything changed.
Warnings/Notes: Oh, we are coming to the end! How exciting! Two more chapters to go! Sorry about the short chapter. Warnings: slavery, mention of non-con, some violence. Evil!Danny Gokey.

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11

At some point during the night, exhaustion won out over anxiety and Kris fell asleep.

He woke hours later to find daylight flooding the room and a pair of familiar blue eyes gazing at him, bright and intent.

He was alert in an instant, muscles locking to sit up, but settled back when he saw that Adam was smiling.

“Hey,” he said.

“Hey.”

He ran a hand over Adam’s shoulder, relishing the softness, the fact that this intimate gesture was now allowed. “How long have you been awake?”

Adam shrugged, the hand tucked under his chin making him appear innocent and angelic. “A little while. Half an hour maybe. Not sure.”

“And you’ve been watching me this whole time?”

“Not the whole time, but mostly. You’re cute when you sleep.”

“Yeah?”

“Uh huh. You look like you’re five.”

Kris laughed. “Nice.”

Adam’s answering grin held a touch of crooked slyness. “I meant that in the best possible way.”

“Right,” he said. Stilling laughing, he rolled his eyes as he felt the morning call of nature. “I need the bathroom. Promise me you won’t run away.”

“I promise I’ll be right here.”

Once inside, he didn’t hurry. He knew there was a 50/50 chance that Adam might not be there when he went back. He also knew that it wouldn’t matter in the end. That if he had to find Adam and talk him down, step away for a while, he would do it, gladly, because in the end, things would be all right.

When finished, he opened the adjoining door to the bedroom and stepped out. And even though he thought he had mentally prepared himself for any eventuality, he found himself sighing with relief at seeing that Adam was still there. And Adam, tangled up in the sheets of his bed, black hair mussed against the pillows, was nothing short of a vision. Kris stilled, giving himself a moment to drink in the sight, until it literally became too much, until Adam’s beauty tore at his heart, causing it to ache.

He ran a hand over his chest before sliding back into bed and propping himself up on one elbow. He noted the way that Adam was watching him. There was no trace of fear in his countenance, just a steady, expectant calm.

Kris understood what that meant - it was time to have the conversation that they’d started last night, the one that Adam had forestalled.

“You’re not freaking out,” Kris said. It was both statement and question.

“No,” Adam said simply, promptly. Then he smiled, looking sheepish. “Maybe a little. But I’m controlling it well, I think.”

“Well, you’re here and not making angry breakfast. I think that’s a good sign.”

“Yeah, well . . . I figured this time, breakfast can wait.”

Kris traced the lines of Adam’s face with his thumb, recalling the spill of tears, now long dry. “Tell me why you were crying?”

Turning over onto his back, Adam sighed. “I was hoping you’d forget about that.”

“Not a chance.”

Adam stared straight up at the ceiling, brow creased as if mulling over the words and how to present them. “I guess I was just a little overwhelmed,” he finally said. “I’ve never . . . ” he paused, issuing another soft sigh. “I’ve never felt anything like that before.”

“Oh.” It wasn’t much in the way of a response, but as confused as he was by Adam’s answer, it was all he could come up with.

Adam, sensing his confusion, turned back over to face him. And where before his voice had been quiet and hesitant, now it nearly burned with intensity.

“Sex with my past owners was always just for them. It was meant to fulfill whatever little fantasy they wanted to fulfill. I didn’t matter at all. I was always just a warm body, not a human being. Never a person.”

“Those are the only times you’ve ever . . . ?”

“There were other times, with other slaves. But it was always in the dark, quick and dirty. Stress release. Nothing more than that.”

Kris listened, trying to take it all in. It was rare that Adam ever talked about himself or his past. Moments like this, unguarded and honest, were special enough that Kris always paid attention, drinking in every word as if he could commit each to memory.

“You know how there are some things that you hear about,” Adam continued, “things you just wish so badly that you could experience and understand? And you’d give anything to, anything at all, but you know that you probably never will?”

Kris nodded to show that he understood, because hadn’t he felt that way about Adam? “Yeah. I do know.”

“Yeah. That was last night, with you. And it was just a little . . . ”

“Overwhelming,” Kris said, finishing for him.

“Overwhelming.” Then Adam smiled. “But in a good way. In a really good way.”

Kris lifted Adam’s hand, interlacing their fingers, marveling at how well they fit together. “Thank you.” And then he lifted their joined hands to his mouth, settling a light kiss against Adam’s wrist.

Adam’s eyes grew seemed to grow larger, darker. “For what?”

“For trusting me. For letting me see you. For last night. For coming into my life. For everything. Just . . . for everything.”

Adam shook his head. “No. You have it all wrong. I should be thanking you.”

“No.”

“But I never do, do I?” Adam’s hand tightened in Kris’, grip just on the verge of painful. He began to speak faster, growing breathless. “I never say it. I never show it.”

“Hey, whoa. Stop. It’s ok. I don’t need you to thank me. That’s not the point. That’s never been the point.”

“Then what is?”

Kris pulled Adam closer with a tug. “This.” Then he wrapped his arms around the larger man, effectively ending the conversation with long, careful kiss.

Afterward, they lay together for as long as they could, enjoying the silence and stillness of the morning until the ringing of the alarm clock mercilessly ended it.

Kris sighed, stirred. “I have to go.”

“I know,” Adam said. “Work beckons.”

“Yeah, something always does.”

They both stood, each on their respective sides of the bed. As Kris watched, Adam bent down, picked up the slave collar from the floor and placed it around his neck. He watched as Adam fumbled with it, fingers not quite able to secure it into place.

Kris walked to stand behind him and placed his hands on the collar, stilling Adam. “Here.”

He was quick and efficient, and within a few seconds Adam turned around, collar in place.

They stood very close, close enough that Kris was forced to tilt his head back to look at Adam. “You don’t know how much I wish . . . ” he began.

Adam shook his head, his smile full of sweetness and sorrow. “I know, sir. I know.” And then Adam was kissing him, merely a ghost of a touch, before walking past him and out the door.